Live for me...

Posted on Sun Dec 28th, 2025 @ 9:59pm by Lieutenant Commander Sabastian Walker & Lieutenant JG Zai Walker
Edited on on Sun Dec 28th, 2025 @ 10:15pm

1,512 words; about a 8 minute read

Mission: Shore Leave - Starbase 1
Location: Vulcan | Shi'Kar City Hospital
Timeline: 4 Days Ago...

ON:

The darkness faded, the deep silence broken by short beeps from machines that were meant to tell the medical staff that he was okay. Sabastian slowly came back to the reality of the world from a deeply beautiful and heartbreaking dream where he and Zai had never traveled to Vulcan. One where they had stayed on the station, gone to Earth, Gone to the Lunar colony or the Kerberos resort on Pluto's moon. In that reality Zai was alive, by his side, smiling.

"But he is not. That is not the reality."

Sabastian's eyes snapped open at the familiar voice. "Shariel! You're Zai's father." Hope bloomed. "He's part whatever you are can't you..."

"No." Shariel walked over to the bed his long robes dragging on the floor.

"But you did it before you used Fang's life force..."

"I did but to use it again would be to take it away. I promised Zai I would not."

"Fine! Use mine."

Shariel shook his head. "It does not work this way."

"Please..."

Shariel, normally cold and composed grimaced at the pain that plea caused. Zai had been his son and in all the years of secretly caring for him he had grown to love him. "He is not gone. Our race takes a different form. He must now dwell with my people, his people. He is not of this world anymore but ....I can do one thing."

"What?" Sabastian sat up throwing the covers off not caring about any of the monitors and leads. "What?"

"I can give you time to say goodbye."

Sabastian shook his head. "No. Can't I go with him?"

Shariel stepped back as a familiar voice drifted in. "You cannot go where I go. You cannot follow me nor will I allow it."

Sabastian felt his heart swell. “Zai..”

Zai walked over to Sabastian and reached out but stopped.

Sabastian reached out instead wrapping his arms around his husband and resting his head on Zai’s shoulder. He held on tight. “I’m never letting go. Take me with you.”

Zai smiled through his tears. “You cannot go. This is my destiny and you have yours. To live, to really live not waiting for me, for our love. You’ve waited a long time for us but in the end we were not meant to be together long. I will treasure what we had but you…you must hold it in your heart and go on. You are destined for another.”

“No! I don’t want another. I want you. Take me with you Zai please!”

“I cannot.” He drew back and cupped Sabastian’s face. “Listen to me. You have lived your life on hold since the Academy. You know of my past and my reasons for leaving my world and coming out. In the end I managed to get past revenge, and anger, I lived for others too but you showed me there is more to life and with you I lived for myself. I took your love, your care, I bloomed and it was a brief time we were together but in that time I lived a lifetime. So please grant me one thing.”

“Anything” Sabastian could swear he felt his heat break.

“Live. I know you, I know the depth of your love the urge to throw your life away and follow me but do not. Even if you did you could not follow me where I go so please live for me, make memories for me, know that when you live, laugh, cry, feel I will know and I will rejoice with all your victories, cry with all your disappointments, and through it all I will love you as fiercely as I did in life.”

“No! I can’t go on. I don’t want to go on without you. Why? Why Zai? Why did you have to step in! Why couldn’t you let them…”

Zai grabbed Sabastian’s shoulders. “Sabastian! You know I could not. I was a Starfleet officer, but above all my people, my tribe sees life as sacred and to give you life protecting others is…the greatest honour. You would have done the same you are just angry and sad. Feel your feelings and slowly heal. I promise you I will help you.”

He looked over at Shariel. “My father has been accepted back by his people. I will go with him. I am like him now and can appear where needed, experience the universe in a new way. Our race we are…observers and even though I am half Capellan my father’s people have taken me into their arms and I will now start a new life.”

“But that’s good you can choose to be with me…”

“No. I cannot. In order to fully embrace them they have asked me to sever all ties here. I have died to his world to be reborn to theirs. My life, my commitments here are over. You and I loved, lived as one, now it is time that ends. Our bond is severed and we are now free. You live, I …. Am not of this world anymore.”

Sabastian shook his head. “So…you’re leaving me. Your choosing to leave.”

“I am choosing to se you free to have a good life, a life filled with joy and love.”

Sabastian pulled away, his hands fisting. “No. There is no joy without you.”

Zai smiled. He felt Shariel’s hand on his shoulder. “I have to go Sabastian. I have to leave but I will promise you, my gift to you will be that you will be happy. I will always, always love you. Know that. Keep that in your heart. I died to this world loving you and I was reborn into the next loving you. I will carry what we had for the rest of my existence.” Zai walked over to Sabastian slipping his hands around Sabastian’s waist and placing a kiss on his back between his shoulder blades. “Be happy my love.”

Just like that he faded.

Sabastian spun around only to see Shariel. He pointed a finger at the being. “I will never forgive you for taking him.”

Shariel sighed. “I am about to break a promise to my son. Listen and listen well. He made the choice that day to come with me. My people figured out his existence. We are a powerful race and we are not allowed to have contact with others. Why do you think I was expelled. They made him an offer. His life for yours. That day you were meant to be in his place but my people told him that he may choose to come back to us, end his existence here and in exchange you would be allowed to continue your life here.”

Sabastian fell to his knees. “No!”

“Yes. Your life for his but he is not gone, not completely. He will never see you again in person but he will know you are safe and alive and despite what you think you will be happy again. My son gave you a life to live, live it. Live it for you and for him.”

Shariel waved a hand and Sabastian was back in bed, the monitors connected.

“I…I…”

“Sleep,” Shariel waved his hand and Sabastian, try as he may to resist, fell back into darkness.

“He will be okay?”

Shariel stepped back to where his son now stood. “Yes. Do you wish to see your body here before we head home?”

“No. It’s just a shell that I have outgrown. Let them mourn over it if they wish. But I want a guarantee. I want to know Sabastian won’t be harmed by your people.”

Shariel sighed. “Our people and he won’t. He will live, he will love again, he will be happy. They made you a promise. It has been set in motion. Now it is up to him to heal his heart but our people will help.”

He sighed. “Very well. Remember your promise to me , father. And I am slightly angry at you for you telling him about the whole I died in his stead thing.”

Shariel smiled. “What can I say, I’m mischievous. A trait in our family that will someday get us into trouble but for now we can enjoy it. As to the promise I do remember. Let’s go and take care of that right now, a final meddling on my part. Then back to the home world. You are now part of the Metrons collective. ”

Zai snorted. “Mischievous is putting it mildly.”

Shariel sighed. “Be happy son. The collective never allows outsiders in and you are half outsider.”

Zai snorted. “They threatened my husband’s life I had no choice. His life is more important to me so it is what it is. Let’s go. We have something to take care of before we go back to the Collective.”

With that the two entities vanished in a burst of white light.

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